Saturday, December 24, 2005

Season's Greetings

A lawyer cousin sent this to me. (He received it from one of his lawyer friends.) Since it claims to be freely transferable (see the find print below), I am posting it here:

Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non-addictive, gender neutral celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or the secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious or secular persuasions and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all.

May you have a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2006, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped to make our country the uniquely wonderful place that it is (not to imply that our country is necessarily greater than any other country, including one of your choice, should yours be different from mine, but nonetheless including and recognizing the distinctiveness of our country) and without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith, political belief, choice of computer platform or sexual preference of the wishee.

By accepting this greeting you are accepting these terms.
This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal.
It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for herself or himself or others, is void where prohibited by law and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher.
This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year, or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and the warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher.

(Seriously, have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!!)